Guide
Parenting Plans in New Hampshire: Building a Schedule That Holds Up
A parenting plan is the part of a family case that people live with every day. This guide explains what a plan has to cover, how courts decide when parents disagree, how a plan can be changed, and what to do when it is not followed.
General information only, prepared by Cahalin Law. It is not legal advice and does not create an attorney-client relationship.
What a parenting plan actually is
In New Hampshire, a parenting plan is the court order that governs how two parents share their children. It covers two different things that are often confused: decision-making responsibility, which is who decides about school, medical care, and religion, and the residential schedule, which is where the children spend their time and when.
The statute behind these orders, RSA 461-A, asks the court to allocate decision-making responsibility in the best interests of the child and to build a schedule around what the child needs. A plan that only says "reasonable rights of visitation" is not really a plan; it is an argument waiting to happen.
What a well-drafted plan includes
A workable plan reads like an operations manual. It names the regular weekly schedule, holiday and school-break schedules on an alternating basis, exchange times and locations, who transports, and what happens when a parent is late. It addresses communication between parents, communication with the children, and how changes are requested.
It also covers the situations people only think about after something goes wrong: medical appointments and emergencies, school conferences and records, extracurricular activities and their cost, travel out of state, and how a parent introduces a new partner to the children. Each of these is a decision the court can make in advance instead of on an emergency motion later.
How courts decide when parents disagree
When the parents cannot agree, the court decides based on the best interests of the child. The factors include each parent's relationship with the child, the child's adjustment to home, school, and community, the stability of each household, the ability of each parent to support the child's relationship with the other parent, and any history of abuse.
Judges are also required to consider the child's preferences in appropriate circumstances, but the weight given to a child's stated preference depends on age, maturity, and the reasons behind it. Courts generally dislike schedules that minimize one parent's involvement without a specific reason, and they dislike plans that require constant cooperation between parents who cannot cooperate.
Changing a plan after it is entered
A parenting plan can be modified, but the parent asking for the change generally has to show a substantial change in circumstances since the last order. A new job, a move, a change in a child's needs, or a parent's failure to follow the existing order can all qualify, depending on the facts.
Where the parents agree to a change, the court can often approve it with a stipulated modification. Where they do not, the requesting parent has to file a motion, and the court decides whether the change serves the child's best interests. Informal arrangements that are never reduced to a court order are the most common source of later conflict, because neither parent can enforce them.
When the other parent does not follow the plan
A parenting plan is an enforceable court order. When one parent refuses to follow it — withholding parenting time, refusing to return the children, or making unilateral decisions — the remedy is a motion asking the court to enforce the order, which can include make-up parenting time and, in some circumstances, a finding of contempt.
Documentation is what makes those motions work: a calendar of what was supposed to happen, what happened instead, and what was said. Text messages and emails written in the moment, without commentary or argument, are far more useful than a summary written months later.
Whether you are negotiating a first plan or trying to enforce one that already exists, the strength of the document and the record behind it usually decides the outcome.